Kitty Zen Picture of the Day

Baby cuteness: 0    Cat butt: 1

Do these things come with refunds?

We brought Corinne home last Thursday afternoon. She was a complete doll as she slept in my arms. However, our sweet, calm daughter decided to pull a 180 on us within the next 12 hours. She screamed when we tried to put her in the bassinet. She went from eating 2oz at each feeding to not wanting to eat at all, and whatever she did eat, she promptly spit back up. She cried and screamed constantly.

Who WAS this kid we brought home? Did we grab the wrong one? Do they come with a 30-day return policy? By Saturday morning, I was in tears. I called the NICU. I called the pediatrician. Our kid wouldn't eat or sleep.

Thankfully, within the last two days, she has returned to her former nice, calm NICU self. She is back to eating like champ, but she still won't sleep in the bassinet. I've taken to co-sleeping with her. As long as she's next to me (or on me or M), she'll sleep like a champ. If she's not being held, or in constant contact with one of us, then she fusses and won't sleep (the carseat is the exception). I know that co-sleeping is a big no-no (according to the current thought of the day). But, damn, we need our sleep.

For some reason, she loves to sleep in the carseat. I've honestly considered putting her to sleep in the carseat at night. I took her with me to my 6 week post pardum appointment (everything looks great in lady-ville, by the way). While she didn't particularly ENJOY being put IN the carseat, within 5 minutes she was asleep and remained that way on the drive up to the appointment, while sitting in the office room (for 45 minutes), on the ride home, and for an additional hour as I just let her sit in the carseat on the floor.

I gave M the task of figuring out how in the world to put the damn Snugli on. Success!

Right after she successfully breastfed (with the nipple shield) today

I dunno...The eyes look pretty blue. We'll see in a few months if a brown eyed momma can produce a blue eyed baby. 

Corinne is home!

I'm sitting here pumping (and blogging) with a sleeping baby in the bassinet next to me AT HOME!!There's actually a live baby in our house. Whoa.

After 39 days in the NICU, Corinne came home today weighing 4lbs 6oz (she was 2lbs 3oz at birth). The odd part is, I gave birth at 3:54p. As we pulled into the garage, I noticed the time was 3:54p.

I got my smug "I have a new baby" moment, smiling at all the people in the lobby who passed by, trying to peer into the carseat to get a looksie at the cute new baby:

And for good measure, (since their policy is to wheel out the parent holding the baby, even if the parent in question gave birth well over a month ago and has long since recovered), M got his moment as well (we never heard of a man being wheeled out, so of course, we had to give it a go):

And, her coming home outfit (I bought another outfit for her to come home in, but it was way too big. This one at least halfway fit):

And, BTW, this whole parenting thing is a breeze so far. I changed a diaper while M put stuff away, and Corinne has been sleeping ever since we got home.

So far, the cat doesn't know what to make of this new arrival. Each time Corinne makes a peep, the cat's ears perk up and she looks around like "What!? What was THAT?!"

Here is her coming home moment:

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29mQ9cTIxh8

"The" Call

Each morning, I get a call from the Dr with a status update. Today's call was "the" call, and was fairly short:

Dr: "Hi, Dr W here. Corinne is ready to come home, so you can come pick her up anytime today. We'll see you soon."

I like phone calls like that.

Good News + Crappy Day

The good news? Corinne can be discharged today!

The crappy day part? As of 10a this morning, I have the stomach flu. Chills, vomiting, sharp pains in the stomach, the runs...the whole nine yards. Awesome timing. I haven't been sick in months, and yet my body picks today to get sick. TODAY!! The gods are having a good laugh at my expense. Mothereffers.

Yep, this was me today. Mulitple times.


I never thought I would be begging the NICU to keep Corinne for longer, but that's just what I did today. I don't want to expose her to whatever it is I have. And selfishly, I want to be there at the hospital to take her home. I've never left that hospital before with a baby (as opposed to an informational packet on grief resources), looking around at all the other people in the lobby smiling like a smug "I just had a baby...what did YOU do today?" person. And dammit, I wanna give that smug smile to people passing by while cradling my cute take home baby and putting her in the car as M runs around and fills the trunk with all of the free diapers and bottles I plan on stealing obtaining before we leave (I heard that if it's not nailed down, take it).

Thankfully, the NICU Dr agreed that us taking her home today wouldn't be in Corinne's best interest, so we'll take her home tomorrow. Hopefully whatever I have will have worked its way out of my system by then. It's 5p now, and I am starting to feel better, so this looks to be a "come on strong, leave quickly" type of illness.

I am still pumping breast milk today, but the Dr said to go ahead and discard it, to minimize the chances of transferring anything to Corinne.

Yesterday, the Dr informed me that during an echo, they found Corinne had a heart murmur. The Dr thinks is being caused by her anemia. Now, this (the heart murmur part) sounds really bad to me, but the Dr was of the "meh" mindset, and said the murmur was was pretty common in preemies and would clear up when the anemia gets resolved (which is also common in preemies). I need to follow up with the pediatrician in a few days, and have her take extra iron to clear the anemia. The nurse mentioned that when they did the echos on all the babies in the NICU yesterday, every single one of them had a heart murmur. So, it makes me feel better to be "one of the masses" as opposed to the "Oh, this doesn't look good" crowd.

On a side note, when I was searching for "pumpkin throw up" images on Google, this picture came up, which looks totally cute, and I plan on doing this to Corinne in October. She'll LOVE it. Who doesn't enjoy sitting in a pumpkin? My mother tortured me with pictures; I fully plan to continue the tradition.

Kitty Zen Picture of the Day

It's a rough life.

5 weeks old

Well, the big news is (aside from being 5 weeks old today), the Dr thinks that Corinne will go home on Wednesday or Thursday OF THIS WEEK!

So, in preparation for her coming home THIS WEEK (yes, capitals are required for news of this magnitude), I met with the nutritionist today to go over how to prepare her meals. They want her to continue eating 26 calories per ounce, and breast milk is only 20 calories an ounce, so I need to add a special preemie formula to her milk. I'm not a fan. I hate formula. It makes her poo stink, it doesn't taste very good, it adds multiple extra steps to her feeding, it's unnatural, the list goes on of why formula is on my sh!t-list. I can't wait until the pediatrician tells us that Corinne can downgrade to just 100% breast milk.

Today, M and I took the infant CPR class. The funniest part of the class was when the instructor went over a list 3 pages long of all the things that are needed to childproof a house (from three different type of outlet covers, depending on how frequently the outlet is used, to all the different types of baby gates that are needed, depending on the location). Then, not less than 20 minutes later, she tells us that a lot of the stuff sold at Babies R Us isn't needed since babies really only need a crib, diapers, and food. I couldn't help myself. I bust out laughing...loudly. The instructor failed to see the irony in her statement.

The other thing that happened today was that Corinne took her car seat test. I needed to place her in the car seat, adjust the straps, and she needed to sit there (strapped in) for 90 minutes without her heart rate/breathing/oxygen saturation levels going out of whack. She passed! Now, all that is left is for her to come home.

Up until now, I haven't really felt like she was OUR baby. Now, I know she is in a rational sense. But, her care is directed by the hospital and the NICU doctors/nurses. So, I've felt like Corinne is THEIR baby. But, this week, she will become ours. I was driving home tonight, grinning like an idiot. I can honestly say, I am so happy right now. She is the prize, the golden goose we have been chasing after since 2007. I feel like my life is complete. I have never been so happy before.

And now for some pictures:

It is amazing how tiny she looks in a car seat. This is the graco snugride 30...one of the few car seats that can accommodate a 4lb baby. When we are out in public with her, and a well-meaning stranger asks how old she is, I don't know how I'm going to answer that question. If I was asked that today, and told them that she was 5 weeks old, they would look at me like I was crazy.

All strapped in a ready for her car seat test!

During the test. The car seat had to be in the base, and she sat there for 90 minutes. She fussed for the first 20 minutes or so (since she wasn't swaddled), but thanks to a full belly (I fed her right before), she slept for the rest of the time.

This picture just cracks me up.

Her first dress

Father's Day

One of M's coworkers, after offering congratulations for the birth of Corinne offered M this sage advice: alcohol is a great tool in the father's arsenol. So, for Father's Day, I gave M a sample pack of different beers from me, and Corinne gave him a framed picture of herself for him to take to work and put on his desk.

A picture of Corinne and her daddy today, on Father's Day:

Yesterday, Corinne had her hearing test. It's a two part test, and she passed both tests. This is one test I wasn't really worried about. She startles when there is loud, shudden noise in her room, so I knew she had at least basic hearing.

• Otacoustic emissions (OAE): During an OAE test, a small earphone is placed into a baby's ear. A sound is emitted, and the otacoustic emission that the ear produces (like an echo) is measured.
• Auditory brain stem response (ABR): During an ABR test, headphones are placed over a baby's ears, and electrodes are placed on the baby's head. Sounds are played into the earphones, and the electrodes measure the brain's response.

Today, Corinne weighed in at 4lbs3oz and measured 42cm (16.5in). So, she gained weight, but not length. We'll see what the doctor has to say about that tomorrow.

Tonight, she needed a bath (actually, I needed one too after she sprayed me with explosive poo during a diaper change that went south....ewwww), so the nurses decided to take out her feeding tube and leave it out. If she ends up needing it in the future, they can put it back in, but hopefully she will continue to meet her goal of taking all 8 feedings per day orally. I fed her today and she sucked down 45mL like a champ, in less than 10 minutes. As long as she's properly awake, she'll eat orally. Last night when M tried to give her a bottle, the poor thing was so tired and couldn't stay awake for the feeding.



Getting weighed before her bath



Bathtime! This is the first bath experience where M and I did on on own...no nurse intervention. Corinne was so happy during her bath. She loves it!



All clean!

Tomorrow, Corinne will take her carseat test (where she has to sit in the carseat for 90 minutes without turning blue), and M and I have the CPR class tomorrow night. Tonight, I'm "rooming in" for the first time. We'll see how much sleep I get....

We're getting close to bringing her home!

Happy One Month Birthday, Corinne!

Or as M would say, the one month ANNIVERSARY of her birth. Either way, cause for celebration!

And for comparison, here she is at 3 days old:

I brought chocolate chip cheesecake bars for the nurses as a "thank you" for helping her to reach one month:

She lost 1/3oz (10 grams) last night, so she's still a bit shy of 4lb. However, she is getting to be a champion bottle feeder. She sucked down 40ml tonight in 5 minutes! We're still trying to figure out the whole burping thing. She has quite petite little burps, and she's a grunter, so it's hard to tell the difference between her normal grunts and an actual burp.

Actually, she's a grunter AND a whimper-er. I tried to take a quick nap in the NICU this afternoon, about 2 hours before my appointment with the lactation consultant. But she kept making these pitiful little sounds, which constantly required me to get up, soothe her for awhile, lay back down again, and then repeat. They weren't full on cries, but more like little mini cries/whimpers every 30 seconds or so. Finally, I just got tired of the whole ordeal, so I picked her up and held her. She quieted down, and about 20 minutes before my appointment with the lactation consultant, she fell asleep. Niiiiiiice timing.

Last night, the nurse asked if she was sleeping in our room when she got home, or in the nursery. We replied that she was going to sleep in our room. The nurse laughed (never a good sign, by the way), and told us that she's a constant noise maker, especially at night, and then wished us luck with getting sleep.

During her afternoon fuss session, she ripped out her feeding tube, so I took the opportunity to take some pictures of her, tubeless.

And, a video:

Eye Doctor

Today, Corinne had her eye appointment with the eye doctor. The one who clamps her eyelids open. The nurse told me it would probably be best if I left the room during the procedure. Apparently, the babies don't take too kindy to having their eyelids clamped open. Shocker, I know. So, I took a field trip to the "NICU Parent Room" to refill my water bottle, and by the time I got back, the check up was done.

I was told afterwards that Corinne didn't fuss very much at all. Her eyelids were swollen for a few hours after the check up, but she fell asleep right after the appointment in my arms, so it didn't appear to damage her too much. The eye doctor said that everything looked good. Her retinal veins show prematurity (which is to be expected, since she was, you know, premature), but everything else looks great, so he gave me "less than 5% odds of something being wrong with her eyes". I need to follow up with him for another check in 2-3 weeks. He asked me if we had a discharge date yet. I told him "no", and the nurse on duty overheard. She chimed in that she would guess discharge would be in about a week and a half.

A week and a half?!?! Whoa. That seems so....soon. It's not set in stone, of course, but the nurse explained that if things continue as they have been, she thinks she'll be ready in about 10 days. I guess we should start reading the car seat manual. I still need to get a snap and go stroller. I've been trolling Craigslist for the last two days trying to find a used one for sale in my area, but none of the sellers have gotten back to me yet. I don't want to pay full price for something that can be easily wiped down and sterilized.

Tonight, Corinne weighed in at 3lb 15oz (hopefully she'll reach the 4lb mark tomorrow or the next day). The doctor ordered her oral feedings increased from 4/day to 6/day. So, now she's only getting 2 feedings/day via the feeding tube.

Oh, I saw the placenta analysis report yesterday. My placenta was on the low end of "normal weight for gestation", older than it should be, and there were a bunch of clots in it. These factors are all a part of pre-e, and contributed to her small size (since less nutrients could flow through the placenta to her). I've been worried, as it appeared that EVERYTHING on her was petite. I thought she has symmetrical growth restriction (where all of her body parts were below normal), but the doctor told me that she actually had asymmetrical growth restriction (where the fetus takes the limited nutrients that are coming in and applies them to the stuff that matters (head/brain) first. Her body and weight were in the "less than 3%" range, but her head was in the "11%-25%" range. She's still in the 3% range (for weight and overall size), but she's growing at a steady pace, which is the most important thing...the doctor wants her to follow the growth curve and is less concerned about where she is on the growth curve.

Asymmetrical = Good (because it means that the brain got the proper nutrients)
Symmetrical = Bad (because the brain wasn't first in line for the nutrients)

Feeding/burping time:

Trying to get a burp out (we both still are having a hard time "hearing" the burp...apparently, she's a modest burper)

Sunday Night Growth Update

The nurses check her growth each Sunday night. Stats for this Sunday night at 35 weeks gestational age:

16.5 inches (she was 15 inches at birth)
3lbs 13oz (she was 2lbs 3oz at birth)

The Dr told me this morning that they would be doing the vision test on her sometime this week. I spoke with nurse today about what it entailed. She recommended to me that parents not watch the vision test, as it can be quite disturbing to witness. Apparently, they clamp her upper and lower eyelids to hold them open (kind of like what they do during a Lasik proceedure), and then shine a light around in them. The nurse said that this process is fast and doesn't hurt the babies, but it is uncomfortable to them, so many cry. (Yeah...I would think having my eyelids clamped open wouldn't be akin to a great vacation.) Like inserting the feeding tube, I'm thinking that this is one proceedure I don't need to be in the same room for. Poor Corinne.

Why does a baby require so much stuff?

We have a lot of baby stuff. A lot. It's amazing to me that such a small person can require such specialized equipment. I went to BabysRUs today to buy the stuff I still needed on my registry...$450 later, I think we're finally "outfitted for baby". A PackNPlay is set up in the family room, a spanking new car seat is in the middle of the floor (approved for preemie use to 4lbs), and I took today to organize and put away all of the hand me downs and shower gifts received.

So, since I was waist-deep in baby stuff, we didn't make it to the NICU until after dinner. Tonight, she weighed in at 3lbs 12oz. M held her for about 2 hours (I took a nap on the "couch" in the NICU room), I tried feeding her a bottle (only about 1/3 went down easy), and I gave her a bath (M played photographer, and the NICU nurse instructed). As she was being undressed for the bath, she spit up big time. Like, projectile spit up. I think she got a good 8 inches in distance! Thankfully, it was easy to clean since she was already undressed. Perfect timing, Corinne!

She is such a water baby. She loves the feeling of the running water from the faucet. She instantly gets calm and just lays there. However, when she's NOT under the running water, then she gets all squirmy. A wet, small, slick, squirmy thing requires no less than 8,000 hands. Sadly, I only have 2.

Drying off:

All dressed (and smelling nice...not like spoiled milk):

Pimp My Crib

Pimping the crib...No, not an MTV show (does anyone else miss music videos?)

The hest lamps have been off for a few days, and Corinne has been maintaining her temperature, so she graduated from the heat lamp bed to the crib!

Heat Lamp Bed (old bed):

Crib (new bed):

Two days ago, she gained 3oz in one day. Yesterday, she lost 3oz. So, she's pretty much at the same weight she was two days ago (somewhere in the neighborhood of 3.5lbs). Since she hasn't really *gained* in the last two days, the Dr increased her feeding amount from 29mL to 31mL. Of course, she still has the additional calorie fortifier in there (which adds 6 calories per ounce of breastmilk) to help her gain weight. The Dr also wants her minimizing her calorie expenditure, so he limited the bottle feedings to no more than 4x/day. Apparently, eating orally takes energy.

Since they increased her feeds, she's spitting up a bit more. I noticed that she had spit up on her shirt, so I took the liberty of changing her. (Which marks the first time I put clothes on her.) Man, she has a floppy head. Thankfully, no crying, but I did get a few pitiful whimpers. I guess I need to fine tune my "putting clothes on a baby" skillz.

The after-changing-result (doesn't she look like a happy camper??):

Last night, the nurse replaced her feeding tube, so she took a few pictures for us of Corinne (tube-less):

Damn...she's cute.

Bottles

Yesterday, the nurse tried giving Corinne a bottle for the first time. She ate (by bottle!) 10mL, which is about 1/3 ounce. For the next feeding, I tried giving her a bottle too. Sadly, Corinne wasn't having any of it. She kept her lips wired shut for me (stubborn) and just wanted to sleep. Bottle feeding is an event which requires wakefulness. Needless to say, it was an epic fail. I think maybe 3mL were taken from the bottle, and I'm fairly certain Corinne drooled out most of it.

For the 5:30p feeding (I wasn't there), the nurse tried bottle feeding again, and Corinne took all 29mL (an ounce, which is her normal feeding amount) orally via the bottle. Originally, the nurse put in 10mL, and then when she sucked that down like Charlie Sheen on a bender, put in a little more and a little more until all 29mL were down the hatch. The nurse was so excited that she called me. I was at home, having dinner. My cell phone told me the hospital was calling me. I've never received a call from them at night (I get a daily status call around 10a from the Dr each day), so I was dreading picking up that phone. I knew that they wouldn't be calling me at home, at night, unless it was something urgent. I was quite releived to hear that the "urgent matter" was just that my kid sucked down a whole feeding.

For the 8:30p feeding, M and I went back to the hospital, and he tried feeding her as well. About 10mL was successful in making its way from the bottle to her mouth:

The nurse also mentioned last night that Corinne will be moved into a crib. Her "heat lamps" have been off for a few days now, and she is maintaing her temperature quite well, so it's into a "big girl" bed (read: crib) for her. Hopefully when I go visit today, she'll be all snug in the new crib.

The Dr said that they'll try feeding her by mouth about 4 times a day (she eats 8 times a day). The golden rule is to not to try to bottle/breast feed for more than 30 minutes each time, or else she spends more calories eating than she would take in. I wish this concept worked for adults too. Where if I spent more time eating, I would burn more calories than I took in. Alas, this doesn't seem to be the case. Le sigh.

She weighed in at 3lbs, 8oz yesterday.

And, here's some recent pictures of cuteness:



Being held by a proud grandma



Baby Shower

I have to admit, it was a bit weird being at my baby shower, and not being the pregnant person. My friend (who shared the same EDD as my second pregnancy) was there at about 39 weeks pregnant. An outsider looking in would think that the shower was for her....but nope. It was for the lady with the oddly-looking deflated stomach.

I'm the infertile in a group of fertiles, so right now (in my group of close friends) everyone is winding down having kids, and we're just starting the journey. For this reason, I not only received a bunch of very thoughtful and generous baby gifts, but towards the end of the shower, the hand me downs came out. "Here's your actual baby shower gift, and here's two trash bags full of hand me downs!" Our wonderful friends have eqippped us with almost everything needed to bring home a baby!

The shower was a small and intimate affair...it was perfect.

In addition to the yummy, yummy cake, someone brought this. Miracle baby, indeed. In so many aspects.

I made this for the shower, primarily to show off her cuteness, but also to combat any questions of "remind me again, how much did she weigh?" etc:

After the shower, M, I, and my mom went to the NICU to see Corinne: